What if pooping was something done in public? And something normal, like texting, needed to be done in a stall

After a night at Bryans...

...I just pooped out half an apple pie. Thanks Bryan.

Still in transit...

So, before I started this post, I had a huge dookie on the way out. Like seroius prairie doggage.

But its like so huge, I'm still working to birth this bad mother.


And I might even finish this post before my evacuations come to fruition.




JUR

The Poop Bloggers (Ploogers? Bloopers?) Dilemma

To all my fellow poop bloggers:

There has been one thing I've noticed since we've started this pooptastic blog.


Every time I want to actually post to the blog while pooping, I usually finish pooping before my post is complete. What do I do?

Well, I could finish my post and keep to the integrity of 'texts while pooping' but then I run the risk of pooping setting on my butt and I will be unclean. Not fun.

OR

I could wipe before my post is done but then risk getting fecal coliform bacteria (look that shit up... oh! See what I did there?) on my beloved droid.


Such a catch 22…

JUR

Moving Vehicle Poop

Time: 4:10pm
Location: Somewhere in Connecticut. More specifically, sitting in my seat on my BoltBus ride back to Boston
Mission: Update the blog

Time: 4:12pm
Location: Sitting on the BoltBus toilet while on I-95
Status: Actually sitting down was a feat. Holding onto the handrail for dear life now as I release.

Time: 4:15pm
Location: Same as before.
Status: Finished, but still need to wipe. Too bad the bus driver had to brake and hit my head on the handrail. No concussion, thankfully....that only happens when I pee.

Time: 4:16pm
Location: Still in the stall
Status: Wiping wasn't too bad. But had to lean against the wall as I buttoned my pants back up. The Purell hand sanitizer was a nice touch though, BoltBus.

Time: 4:18pm
Location: Back in my seat
Mission: Accomplished

Chh!

-JMH

pooping in the library in

pooping in the library

in a library, you have to be quiet. its just a rule... but in the bathroom, people are dropping bombs!

With this update, I release all the tension from the last week. I let go of all the stress of my senior project, unload the late nights up studying. No longer do I have to work all day and night and squeeze in quick updates when I can. For this poop, it can take as long as it has to. And for that, I am relieved.
Thank you GSU for providing a throne unto which I can expel the crap that was the last week...and for giving us Panda Express.
Until next time.